December 07, 2009

Different Ways to Do the Same Things

We have a standard set of rules in our house. No hitting, no biting, no sassing, etc. Still, I think it has to be confusing for our daughters to try and figure out the subtle differences between the way Hubby does things and the way I do things.
It's not that Hubby and I have drastically different ways of doing things, it's just that we prefer different methods when it comes to certain things. For instance, in the mornings Roo is often the first one up. She'll use the bathroom and then look around her room to see if anyone else is awake. If everyone is awake (or if she thinks they should be awake) she'll turn the bedroom light on. I don't have a problem with that, since everyone's going to be up soon anyway. Hubby, however, makes her keep the light off on the mornings he's in charge, so her sisters can savor every millisecond of sleep. I've started trying to do it his way, just so she's a little less confused.
After meals I usually have the girls stand on their chairs so I can wipe off their hands and faces. It's easier on my back. I realize I'll have to stop this practice one day, but for now it works best for me. Hubby does not want them standing on their chairs after meals. I have been told by my daughters "You like us to stand. Daddy doesn't." At least they're figuring it out.
I know we're not alone with this dilemma. Every parent has different styles of doing things. I don't think it's a bad thing. Yes, it can still be confusing at a young age, but it's teaching our girls to adapt to different environments and go with the flow. Either that or I'm just a big pushover.


Stephanie B said...

I agree with you. The world is full of figures of authority that need different responses and different rules. As long as you aren't violently contradictory or punish the children for doing things the way the other parent said, I don't see a problem.

HST said...

Since subtle differences cannot be avoided I think it should be considered part of the learning process that people are different and may do things differently. In our household that also means that sometimes we decide to let our kids do things their own way even if we would not do it the same way.

On the big things like hitting, kicking, screaming etc. there is no wiggle room. Mom and Dad is a solid, united force to deal with.

Quadmama said...

As I sit hear listening to all four scream... yeah, there's no wiggle room on some things. But sometimes I think I put up with it more than Hubby LOL!

Angela said...

And how do you do this times 4? I'm glad you're a little ahead of me and will impart much wisdom our way...heehee

Quadmama said...

That's a good question... I'll let you know when I have a good answer!

Anonymous said...

That's why I'm following this site. To glean tips from the Quadmama!

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