When Was I Voted Neighborhood Babysitter?

We spend a lot of time at our neighborhood pool. My girls love the water and it's an easy way to wear them out. There's no lifeguard on duty, so you really need to keep an eye on your children... or not. Every summer I feel as though I 'm one of the only parents who understands swimming pools can be dangerous.
To use the pool without an adult, you need to be 14 or older. Anyone under 14 has to be accompanied by someone 18 or older, meaning a 14 year old can't bring guests. The pool opens at 8am, but the pool monitor doesn't show up until 2pm, and I'm always amazed by the number of families trying to skirt the rules. You can argue that a 14 year old can be responsible for a 10 year old. It doesn't really bother me when a teen under 18 is there with a younger sibling. It does bother me when an 8 or 10 year old shows up with no adult supervision. Basically you're saying either you don't care what happens to your child, or you expect the rest of us to watch your child. What happens when there aren't any other adults there? 
The other day there was a woman at the pool who brought several guests with young children. They let the kids loose while the adults sunbathed. At some point, the adults moved to a different spot so they wouldn't get splashed. A young boy with them, who was two or three, didn't see them move, so once he tired of playing on the pool steps, he had a meltdown, screaming "I can't find my mommy! Where is she? I miss her." Mom's reaction? She never even looked up to see what was going on. I finally went over to him to calm him down and show him where his mom was. The pool monitor came over and took him to mom... and the chewed mom out for not watching her kid. As the woman next to me said "Thank goodness for other moms at the pool."
It's not just the pool where I feel like I'm the only one watching my children and everyone else's. We went to the park last week and a woman showed up with two kids, who appeared to be 4 and 6-ish. She let them out of the car and then walked to the outhouse, which was about a block away. Was I supposed to be watching her girls? This particular park is in a remote area, but there are tons of cars driving by, plus there's a lake nearby. I'm glad I look like a trusting individual, but what exactly do you want me to do if one of them tumbles off the monkey bars? I'm already watching four of my own!
I recently took two of my daughters to a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese. I was the only parent who stayed with their kids. The other parents camped out at a table with their backs to the game area. Granted, Chuck E. Cheese has a pretty good system in place for making sure children leave with the same adults who brought them, but the idea of my 6 year olds running by themselves wasn't my idea of a safe time. I've seen kids grab other children's tickets, push to the front of the line, etc. Why put your children in that position. Half the games I had to explain to my daughters (and the other party attendees) how to play. We were all having fun, but it was a little overwhelming to be the only visible parent, since all the kids would come to me when they needed help.
I swear I'm not a helicopter mom. I don't hover. At the park, they play while I watch from the bench. At the pool I no longer feel the need to be right at the edge, but I still watch them. I'm not willing to sacrifice my daughters' safety.

I'm Not A Babysitter

Some people likely think I'm too protective. I keep a close watch on my daughters when I am out and about with them. At the park, I'm not sitting on a bench. I'm right there keeping an eye on my girls. Sometimes I wonder if other parents think "She's already watching four, so she can watch mine, too" because I always seem to end up watching every child in the vicinity.
Here are some examples of this: The other day we went to the park. Hubby and I stayed close to our girls. There were tons of kids at the park. Most of the moms sat together and chatted away, while their children darted here and there. I realize older children don't necessarily need as much supervision, but I'm talking about five and younger. A large portion of these children were at the park for a preschool field trip. If they had been my kids I would have been furious at the lack of supervision. This wasn't a fenced in school playground. It's an open, public park.
At our neighborhood pool yesterday we were hanging out in the "little pool" (don't you dare call it the baby pool) with another family. It just so happened they have twins the same age as my girls. So our six girls played together and we all played with them. Then another little girl came and joined in the fun. No big deal. She was about the same age as all the other girls, fourish. Eventually I looked around. I spotted her mom on the opposite side of the pool, laying on a towel reading a book.... clearly not concerned about where her preschooler was... AT THE POOL! Come on. This has to be one of the most dangerous places to lose track of your child. She came over once, sat for a few minutes and then left. I think she wanted to make sure we had it all under control. Keep in mind our pool does not have a life guard and the little girl didn't know how to swim (early I saw her in the big pool using water wings and clinging to her mom).
I realize everyone has different ways of parenting. I try not to judge because what works best for my family won't work for the next family. I just have a hard time understanding parents who are so oblivious to what their children are doing. The former news reporter in me has seen what can happen to children when their parents turn their heads for an instant. Maybe that's why I'm so protective. But I would rather be safe than sorry.

Doing It Alone

Some of my blogging friends post every now and then about their husbands being gone for days at a time for work. I have always wondered what would happen if I were in charge of my daughters for several days with no other help. I don't need to wonder any longer.
Due to a death in the family, Hubby has been out of town since Sunday. Logistically it just wouldn't work to take four toddlers on the whirlwind trip (a 12 hour drive Sunday, the funeral Monday, and a 12 hour drive home today). So I braced myself for a few long days.
Sunday went much better than I imagined. We busied ourselves in the morning with bubbles in the backyard. In the afternoon we watched Snow White. By bed time all five of us were exhausted. Monday was a day full of preschool preparations. In the morning we met the teacher and visited the classroom. After lunch we went shopping for school supplies (note to teachers: please do not wait until a week before school starts to distribute your supply list. It was slim pickin's at Target). Today we will hopefully go to the pool and simply bide our time until Hubby returns.
It's the nights that were the worst. Every little sound spooked me. I was concerned about what would happen if there were an emergency in the middle of the night and I was the only adult around. I know, I know. I sound like a wuss. I live in a "nice" neighborhood, but I think I have reasons to be a tad paranoid. In the two years we have lived in this house our front window and a garage window have been shot out with a BB gun (the unknown culprit still owes us $500 so we can fix the huge picture window), we have found used syringes in one of our window wells, and people some times ring our door bell after dark looking for the renters down the street who must not work and are always throwing a party. I did mention it's a "nice" neighborhood, right? So each night I braced myself for one of two noises... either the shrieking of our home security system or the cries of Tortilla who went diaper free while Hubby was gone. I'm happy to say neither of those sounds were heard.
Fortunately, we have recently become friendly with the couple who live directly behind us. They are smitten with the girls and just a fun couple to hang with. The male half is a former firefighter and paramedic, so I knew if a medical emergency arose I could call on him.
I think everyone expected me to be pulling my hair by now. My daughters can definitely have their meltdowns. I was pleasantly surprised by their behavior during the past few days. Now if Hubby can just arrive home safely, I can rest easy.